transgender

Happy 10th Birthday to Marriage Equality

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Today, June 26th, 2025, marks the 10th anniversary of the Obergefell decision by the United States Supreme Court which established that the right to marry is a fundamental right guaranteed to same-sex couples.

It was a joyous occasion, and happened to get handed down in the final days of Pride Month in 2015. There was a spontaneous celebration in the streets outside the historic Stonewall Inn in the West Village of New York City, a landmark in the LGBTQ+ equality movement. I had the good fortune of being there, and below are some photos from that day.

Ten years later, this Pride Month feels less celebratory. The state of our country and our world is… fraught. We can no more take for granted Obergefell than we could Roe. Because make no mistake, the same elements that overturned a nationwide right to abortion want to do the same for same-sex marriage. If you asked me years ago if I thought this was a possibility, I’d have said “no way!” But I could never have predicted so much of what is transpiring right now.

While I maintain that abortion and same-sex marriage are different in many ways, the forces in control of our country are forging ahead with their hateful agenda with little regard for public opinion. Checks and balances are breaking down, where they are holding at all, and the current Supreme Court is one of the worst in history. They are enabling Trump’s agenda (after first giving the President carte blanche to commit crimes in office) and backing into a (frequently tortured) legal reasoning to justify their intended outcomes. Justice Thomas has stated that the court could reverse this decision, and more.

One big thing that has changed since Obergefell, in our favor, is that the Respect for Marriage Act was passed, which repealed DOMA and requires the US government and all states and territories to recognize same-sex and interracial civil marriages. So the Supreme Court can’t simply overturn Obergefell and roll back the clock on marriage equality. The bad news is, I don’t believe this ideological and subservient Court is incapable of overturning the RFMA. Jim Obergefell himself says “[Same sex] marriage is not safe. and I think anyone who says it is, I think they’re fooling themselves.” Just look at what we’ve seen already:

  • An all out assault on “DEI” initiatives in government, education and the private sector. Corporations who just last year were waving rainbow flags folded like a cheap suit and abandoned their employees and customers in a heartbeat.
  • The Trump admin announced they are ending the option for LGBTQ+ youth callers to the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline to be connected with counselors trained specifically to assist LGBTQ+ contacts up to age 25.
  • House Republicans inserted language into the DHS funding bill to give civil immunity under federal law to individuals and organizations that discriminate against same-sex couples—by citing a religious or moral belief that marriage should be limited to one man and one woman.
  • And much more…

So what does this mean? It’s Pride and we should celebrate. These are difficult times and we need to take care of ourselves mentally to get through them, which can include letting loose every now and then. But we should also be vigilant. Our country has regressed so much, so fast, and it’s not done yet. Any cisgender LGB person who dismisses attacks on trans folks as a “distraction” or doesn’t think that concerns them needs to wake up. Even if you set aside the moral obligation to fight for the rights of others—and you shouldn’t—the type of government we have now depends on “othering” and having enemies without and within. Today the “enemies within” are immigrants and trans folks but it won’t stop there. What happens when we’ve deported the immigrants and fully oppressed trans people? The writing is on the wall. So let’s have fun today, but remember that tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. We have to fight like hell for it.

Trans Day of Visibility

joshLeave a comment

*tap tap* Is this thing on? Oh, hi there! Been ages since I’ve written anything here. You’d think between Trump, guns and all the other craziness I’d be here all the time. But it’s almost too overwhelming… I never know where to start… or where to stop.

But today I’m here to briefly (which is not usually my way) write about International Trans Day of Visibility.

I do know some trans people. While I can’t say I understand, I don’t need to understand to treat them with dignity and respect, and to speak up against discriminatory measures against them, like the recent trans military ban. And neither do you!

If you know someone before and after transitioning, it can be particularly challenging. You have to get used to different pronouns–which won’t come naturally–and probably a different name. It’s a struggle. You’ll fuck up from time to time. But what’s important is putting in the effort, and showing that you care.

A recent study published in the Journal of Adolescent Health shows how important it can be to make that effort. Via ThinkProgress:

Researchers at the University of Texas at Austin interviewed transgender youths ages 15-21 in three cities in different parts of the country about their chosen name use, depressive symptoms, and suicidal thinking and behavior. Respondents indicated whether they were able to use their chosen name in different contexts, including at home, at school, at work, or with friends.

The results showed a very clear link. For each additional context in which they could go by their chosen name, there was a 29 percent decrease in suicidal thoughts and a 56 percent decrease in suicidal behavior.

Emphasis added.

Simply using a person’s chosen name can literally help to save their life! According to the National Institutes of Health, the rate of suicide attempts for transgender people ranges from 32% to 50% in various countries, with 41% of American trans people trying to take their own life at least once. In Australia, fully half of transgender people attempt suicide, which is staggering.

To all the transgender people out there, whether friends, acquaintances or strangers, on this Trans Day of Visibility I want to tell you I see you. I may fuck up from time to time when it comes to a pronoun or a name, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have your back. Stay strong!