Happy 10th Birthday to Marriage Equality

Today, June 26th, 2025, marks the 10th anniversary of the Obergefell decision by the United States Supreme Court which established that the right to marry is a fundamental right guaranteed to same-sex couples.

It was a joyous occasion, and happened to get handed down in the final days of Pride Month in 2015. There was a spontaneous celebration in the streets outside the historic Stonewall Inn in the West Village of New York City, a landmark in the LGBTQ+ equality movement. I had the good fortune of being there, and below are some photos from that day.

Ten years later, this Pride Month feels less celebratory. The state of our country and our world is… fraught. We can no more take for granted Obergefell than we could Roe. Because make no mistake, the same elements that overturned a nationwide right to abortion want to do the same for same-sex marriage. If you asked me years ago if I thought this was a possibility, I’d have said “no way!” But I could never have predicted so much of what is transpiring right now.

While I maintain that abortion and same-sex marriage are different in many ways, the forces in control of our country are forging ahead with their hateful agenda with little regard for public opinion. Checks and balances are breaking down, where they are holding at all, and the current Supreme Court is one of the worst in history. They are enabling Trump’s agenda (after first giving the President carte blanche to commit crimes in office) and backing into a (frequently tortured) legal reasoning to justify their intended outcomes. Justice Thomas has stated that the court could reverse this decision, and more.

One big thing that has changed since Obergefell, in our favor, is that the Respect for Marriage Act was passed, which repealed DOMA and requires the US government and all states and territories to recognize same-sex and interracial civil marriages. So the Supreme Court can’t simply overturn Obergefell and roll back the clock on marriage equality. The bad news is, I don’t believe this ideological and subservient Court is incapable of overturning the RFMA. Jim Obergefell himself says “[Same sex] marriage is not safe. and I think anyone who says it is, I think they’re fooling themselves.” Just look at what we’ve seen already:

  • An all out assault on “DEI” initiatives in government, education and the private sector. Corporations who just last year were waving rainbow flags folded like a cheap suit and abandoned their employees and customers in a heartbeat.
  • The Trump admin announced they are ending the option for LGBTQ+ youth callers to the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline to be connected with counselors trained specifically to assist LGBTQ+ contacts up to age 25.
  • House Republicans inserted language into the DHS funding bill to give civil immunity under federal law to individuals and organizations that discriminate against same-sex couples—by citing a religious or moral belief that marriage should be limited to one man and one woman.
  • And much more…

So what does this mean? It’s Pride and we should celebrate. These are difficult times and we need to take care of ourselves mentally to get through them, which can include letting loose every now and then. But we should also be vigilant. Our country has regressed so much, so fast, and it’s not done yet. Any cisgender LGB person who dismisses attacks on trans folks as a “distraction” or doesn’t think that concerns them needs to wake up. Even if you set aside the moral obligation to fight for the rights of others—and you shouldn’t—the type of government we have now depends on “othering” and having enemies without and within. Today the “enemies within” are immigrants and trans folks but it won’t stop there. What happens when we’ve deported the immigrants and fully oppressed trans people? The writing is on the wall. So let’s have fun today, but remember that tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. We have to fight like hell for it.

Now What?

Image of a magnet in the style of a Democratic donkey logo, blue on top, red on the bottom with 4 white starts horizontally in the blue half.

Well, well, well. We’re a little over two weeks into the second Trump presidency and… holy fucking shit! I think even many of us who were shouting warnings about Trump have been a little taken aback by the breadth, depth and brazenness of fuckery that has unfolded in such a short period of time. What I, at least, am not surprised by is the complete unwillingness of elected Republicans—members of the so-called “party of law & order”—to do anything at all to reign in the lawlessness or the parade of dangerously unqualified (and often disqualified) nominees for federal office.

Surely they’ll step in when he does something unconstitutional though right? After all, these people act like the Constitution is second to the Bible (with the Second Amendment maybe being on par).

Sen. Thom Tillis, R-N.C., did acknowledge that an executive branch move to turn off a federal agency “runs afoul of the Constitution in the strictest sense.”

It’s not uncommon for presidents to flex a little bit on where they can spend and where they can stop spending,” Tillis said. “Nobody should bellyache about that.”

Source

Oh, yeah let’s not bellyache about something that runs “afoul of the Constitution”.

In order to take a break from the doom spiral of today and look to the future, assuming for the moment that we manage to survive this existential crisis and still have free and open elections in two and four years, I want to pose a question: How do Democrats become the party of America’s future? I don’t plan do dive deep in Monday morning quarterbacking of the election, but I think the topic requires at least a little consideration of What Went Wrong.

To start with, I want to make it clear that I do not believe both parties are the same. The Democratic Party is far better than the Republican Party, now more than ever—though that last part is more because the GOP has gotten far worse than the Dems getting better.

But there was almost certainly a lack of enthusiasm in this last election. An estimated 89 million eligible voters sat out the 2024 presidential election. Voter turnout in 2024 was 63.9% (156.3M total votes) compared to 65.% (158.4 M total votes) in 2020 (which, granted, was the highest percentage since 1900). Netted out, more than 2 million Americans who vote in 2020 didn’t voted in 2024. Harris could have won with less than 230,000 additional votes in 3 key states.

There are many people who simply don’t see enough difference between the two parties right now. Both parties are beholden to big money donors and corporate interests. And while there are some polarizing issues that rile up their respective bases, when it comes to our actual politicians (not necessarily voters) there is a lot of common ground. Trump, despite having been president once already, is seen as an outsider. Many independent voters, unhappy with the status quo and not believing Harris would do anything differently swung to Trump, a disruptor.

And while many Democratic voters may consider themselves to be quite liberal, the Democratic platform and many leaders have remained rather moderate. This could lead to Democrats feeling like their party is not representing their views. Even though they should have known better, the numbers tell us some liberal voters sat out this election.

So what should the party do? I believe they need to—hear me out—be much more aggressively progressive. Some Democrats look at the results of the election and conclude they should be even more moderate and bipartisan to woo persuadable right-leaning voters, but I think that’s wrong. They can’t out-Republican the Republicans, so they shouldn’t try. They need to be the Party of America’s future by radically rethinking how we do things in this country.

I’m not saying the Democrats should do all these or that this is an exhaustive list, but some things that should be up for consideration:

  • Universal Basic Income
  • Complete overhaul of the healthcare system, ideally single payer
  • Campaign finance reform
  • Overhaul and simplify the tax code
  • Rethink policing, crime prevention and the justice system (end mass incarceration)
  • Gun control (duh)
  • Reign in private equity and other destructive economic forces
  • Assertively support human rights around the world
  • Fiercely protect the planet, including renewable energy

These aren’t new ideas. A few have been tried before (looking at you, single payer and gun control). Some, like tax reform, aren’t particularly “lefty” ideas. But they all entail pretty radical changes and they would generally make American lives better. None of them will be easy, and critics will say we can’t actually do any of these things. Certainly we can’t do them—wholesale—right now, but remember how Barack Obama sailed into the White House on a wave of Hope. Democrats haven’t been giving people much to hope for lately. The last three presidential elections have largely been “Trump is bad, and we’re not Trump.” Accurate, but not inspiring enough, even it if managed to work once, and he can’t be the boogeyman forever.

The starting point is a bold new vision for the party. From there you prioritize and start breaking it down into stages. Messaging will be key; make sure people understand the road to get where we want to be will be long. It won’t be accomplished in one term or one presidency. But we’ll all work together toward these goals, one step at a time. Each step improving lives. Who knows? Maybe after some wins Democrats will get enough of a mandate to start making big changes, like ripping and replacing the tax code.

What do you think? What else should be on the list? Or, do you think I’m totally wrong? Leave your comments below and let’s discuss.

Trump Happened

So, Trump happened. I kept hoping I’d wake up from this nightmare, or some superhero would swoop in and save us, but no, this is the reality. Donald Trump is sitting in the Oval Office at the White House.

Now what?

I’m gay, but I’m also white and male and I earn a comfortable living (aside: I’m willing to bet most in the “Gays for Trump” camp fit that description as well), so I enjoy a certain amount of privilege. If I were to put my head down, stay quiet and not cause any trouble for the next few years, I’d probably be–relatively speaking–OK.

Fuck that.

It’s not good enough. It should never be good enough, not for me, not for you, not for anyone. I plan to use whatever privilege I have to support and protect those who need it. And when I run out of privilege, I’ll keep going. This time is going to be a true test of our character. I don’t know what the fighting is going to entail, but I suspect there will be a lot it. We can’t allow our country to get less equal, less safe or less free. America has always been a work in progress. Even 18 months ago, when the idea of President Trump was a joke to almost everyone (even Donald himself), no one thought this country was perfect. But we had just witnessed an era of progress, despite unprecedented obstructionism from our historically useless Congress, dominated by a radicalized Republican party. I was excited to keep that progress going!

But that progress is going to have to wait; that radicalized party is in control, and led by a monster. For now we’ll be fighting tooth and nail just to keep what we have, to not take too many steps back.

So the first thing I’m going to do–the first of many, but we have to start somewhere–is to attend the Chicago version of the Women’s March tomorrow (or today, it’s almost midnight as I type this). Of his many bad qualities, Donald’s attitude–and resulting behavior–toward women is probably the most appalling. He views women as objects, either to be obtained like trophies or as a means to an end. They’re certainly not equals. Even without him, the Republican party had been chipping away at women’s health for years and more recently began ramping up that assault, attempting to obliterate Planned Parenthood.

It’s a small thing, but tomorrow (today) I’ll stand with my sisters and send a message.

If you come for them, you come for me, too.

Hate in the States

msprotest
Protest in Mississippi

As I type this, hundreds are gathered in Jackson, the capitol of Mississippi, protesting the state’s HB 1523, the preposterously-named “Protecting Freedom of Conscience from Government Discrimination Act” and urging the governor to veto it. The fallout from North Carolina’s HB 2 (pdf) is still coming down. What the heck is going on?

While the recent successes for LGBT rights in the U.S.–particularly the Obergefell v. Hodges Supreme Court ruling–have caused many to let their guards down and celebrate victory, others have been urging us to stay vigilant. In his book “It’s Not Over“, author, activist  and radio host Michelangelo Signorile predicted a backlash, and warned us against “victory blindness”. It turns out, he was right.

We have seen a rash of anti-LGBT laws sweep the country, mostly at the state level and often under the guise of “religious freedom”. Let’s take a look at a few of the worst of them. Continue reading

And Now We Have Arkansas (What the Fuck?)

Following the footsteps of Kansas, Arizona and Mississippi, the state of Arkansas is trying to use legislation to keep anti-LGBT discrimination alive and well. But this approach is a bit different. Rather than using “religious freedom”, which has proven controversial–and gotten legislation dropped in Kansas and vetoed in Arizona–they are going for the innocuous sounding “standardizing” non-discrimination ordinances across the state.

According the AR branch of the ACLU, “SB 202 prohibits cities, counties, and towns from passing laws that create any “protected class” or “prohibit discrimination” that go beyond state law.”

This means cities can’t restrict discrimination any further than the state does. And guess what? The state doesn’t protect against anti-LGBT discrimination! The ACLU claims it’s “a direct fear response to Fayetteville’s passage of an ordinance protecting people from discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity.”

A different technique for the same old shit! They aren’t even being subtle about it.

State Senator Bart Hester has introduced an emergency bill, SB 202, which would strike down all nondiscrimination ordinances in the state permanently.

Hester believes that to allow LGBT people to have protections in the workplace and to have legal recourse against cases of discrimination goes too far, granting “special rights” to people who aren’t like him.

The 37-year-old GOP official told BuzzFeed that sure, LGBT people get discriminated against sometimes, but these days, “we are all singled out for discrimination.”

“I am singled out as a politician. I am singled out because I am married to one woman,” Hester said. “I want everyone in the LGBT community to have the same rights I do. I do not want them to have special rights that I do not have.”

(source)

Oh, he’s “singled out” as a politician (maybe because politicians do shit like this?) and for being “married to one woman”? Really?

There is a site dedicated to encouraging the governor to veto it. Let’s hope he does.

Not sure this is a bad law? Hate group leader and general asshole Tony Perkins loves it. What more do you need?

Arizona SB 1062 dissected

Let’s take a closer look at the bill currently sitting on Arizona Governor Jan Brewer’s desk, awaiting her signature. It is SB 1062 “AMENDING SECTIONS 41-1493 AND 41-1493.01, ARIZONA REVISED STATUTES; RELATING TO THE FREE EXERCISE OF RELIGION.” Full text available here (pdf) for now. (Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer, take my analysis with a big grain of salt.)

First of all, this is amending an existing law, not creating a new one. Arizona already has a law to protect religious freedom. This amendment extends its reach to ridiculous and unenforceable proportions.

What are some of the key changes? (Additions to existing law in bold and caps).

In Section 1:

19 5. “Person” includes a religious assembly or institution ANY
20 INDIVIDUAL, ASSOCIATION, PARTNERSHIP, CORPORATION, CHURCH, RELIGIOUS ASSEMBLY
21 OR INSTITUTION OR OTHER BUSINESS ORGANIZATION
.

Cue Mitt Romney: “Corporations are people, my friend!” Apparently in Arizona, corporations may also have religious beliefs. This ought to be a warning sign that things are starting to go off the rails in Arizona when any business entity is given “person” status in relation to religious practices and beliefs.
Continue reading

Arizona, What the Fuck?

While my attention was elsewhere the Arizona legislature passed an anti-gay discrimination law similar to the nonsense that was considered in Kansas.

What the fuck?!

The Arizona legislature gave final approval to legislation that allows business owners asserting their religious beliefs to refuse service to gays, drawing backlash from Democrats who called the proposal “state-sanctioned discrimination” and an embarrassment.

The 33-27 vote by the House Thursday evening sends the legislation to Republican Governor Jan Brewer and puts Arizona back at the forefront of a polarizing piece of legislation four years after the state enacted an immigration crackdown that caused a national furor.

from the Guardian

Of course, the GOP supporters claim this is about preventing discrimination!

“This bill is not about allowing discrimination,” Yarbrough said. “This bill is about preventing discrimination against people who are clearly living out their faith.”

So if someone’s “faith” tells them to kill infidels, we should probably protect that too, right? My faith tells me to punch those fucking jackasses in the nuts. I’m so over this bullshit.

If Jan Brewer signs this, she and all those who voted for it should be impeached for failing to uphold the Constitution of the United States.

Kansas Update

It would appear some Kansas Republicans are not complete hypocritical assholes. An update to my previous post on the “Turn Away the Gay” law working its way through the KS legislature:

I am pleased to report that the Republican-led Kansas Senate decided this would not fly. Senate President Susan Wagle said on Thursday that a majority of the state senators in her party would not vote for the bill. They support “traditional marriage,” Wagle noted, “however, my members also don’t condone discrimination.” Thank you for that line in the sand. It should be obvious, but somehow that was lost on the Kansas House.

From Slate

Thanks to the GOP Senators, the bill is likely to just fade away, without hearings or a vote. Good riddance to horrible, atrocious rubbish!

Kansas, What the Fuck?

Work has been kicking my ass (and still is) so I don’t have time to get into this, but I wanted to get a WTF post out there, in case people aware of this bullshit.

The Kansas state legislature is on the verge of approving—and Kansas’s Republican governor has pledged to sign—a bill that legalizes discrimination against gay couples. Businesses, individuals, government employees—anyone will be able to discriminate against gay couples once the law is signed. Under the law firefighters could refuse to put out a fire if the house was owned by a gay couple.

What in all the fucks are they thinking?

The piece this quote is taken from is definitely worth a read, and a share.

I just… I can’t even right now.

Scum of the Earth

Tea Party Group Founder Calls For Class Action Suit Against Homosexuality

It is for people like this that the phrase “scum of the earth” was coined. You’d be hard pressed to find worse people who openly extol their wretchedness and who aren’t already behind bars or on a “Most Wanted” list.

“Peter,” Scarborough said, “the whole issue of a class action lawsuit, you and I have talked about this a little bit. I just wonder if you’ve explored that, talked to anyone about it. Obviously, statistically now even the Centers for Disease Control verifies that homosexuality much more likely leads to AIDS than smoking leads to cancer. And yet the entire nation has rejected smoking, billions of dollars are put into a trust fund to help cancer victims and the tobacco industry was held accountable for that. Any thoughts on that kind of an approach?”

OK, I am legitimately curious as to who this lawsuit would be against? Of course, Peter [LaBarbera] likes the idea, responding “Yeah I think that’s great. I would love to see it.”

And then:

LaBarbera went on to say, “We always wanted to see one of the kids in high school who was counseled by the official school counselor to just be gay, then he comes down with HIV.”

Yeah, he said they “always wanted to see” a high school kid get HIV. I mean, really? These people profess to be Christian? Disgusting.